WRITING – Four Things to Think About When Writing a Novel Part 3 of 4.
Simpsons Quote:
Lisa: ”Can you tell me what happens at the end of the series?”
JK Rowling (kind of ticked): “Yes, he grows up and marries you… Is that what you want to hear?”
Lisa (sighs, happily): ”Yes…”
Hi. Welcome to video three of “Things to Think About When You’re Writing a Novel”. Again, I’m joined by my wife, Alesha Escobar, and today we’re going to be talking about decompression.
You can either watch the video or read the transcription below:
Some of the links below are affiliate links. Thanks for your support.
About Decompression
Luis: I’ve been editing my wife’s books for quite a long time and I’ve been reading her books even before she was getting published – publishing her books. And currently she’s writing the Gray Tower.
Luis:And this is the second one: Dark Rift. And I’m currently working on reading through the manuscript, Circadian Circle – she’s already finished the first draft. And I’m a little bit over halfway through. So I’m kind of in editor mode right now. But again, one of the things that we wanted to bring up his decompression. Now decompression. What do I mean by decompression?
Alesha: By decompression you mean taking a scene that is merely just a summary or maybe crunched up a little bit too short and developing it so that you add some more detail, maybe some more dialogue and kind of make it a bit more flavorful.
Luis:Right. I’ve noticed that when you’re starting – when most beginning writers start writing they just tend to just sum up moments just to get to either their favorite moments or the good parts or I don’t know what, or just to get through the story. And a lot of the times that’s okay. Sometimes you just kind of want to sum up things because they’re not really all that important. But most of the time you would kind of want to err on the side of decompression, only because what it does is it opens up the characters more. You get into the character’s heads more, you live through the moments more, you empathize with the characters a lot more. So that’s kind of the benefits of decompression.
Very early on Alesha used to compress way too much and it was a very fast read. But it also didn’t have any emotional impact because it was much too compressed. She doesn’t necessarily have that problem anymore. Occasionally, I would say this paragraph might need to be decompressed a little bit more. But generally it’s working really well. So let’s talk about Tower’s Alchemist and let’s talk about a moment in the book where we had to decompress something, where I thought it would be a good idea.
Alesha: Yes. I believe its close to the middle of the book where Isabella has to make it into a weapons factory, infiltrate it basically under a false identity with a couple of allies and basically uses her alchemy to neutralize these chemicals that have been kind of mixed in with a dark alchemical spell.
Luis:Yeah. So it’s kind of like the, “defuse the bomb moment” right where like the character has to defuse the bomb before it blows up. I’m only saying that so that you don’t put too much detail about what’s actually happening. But it’s kind of that, that kind of a moment.
Alesha: And I think originally I had her go in, you know, she does her job; she’s efficient at it, right. She’s trained. But then it first didn’t have the impact that it should have because it wasn’t as decompressed. For example…
Luis: Yeah, it didn’t – it lacked a little bit of the tension. It lacked tension because it was just too summed up. It was just a little bit too summed up.
Alesha: Right. So what I added was kind of what’s going through her head at this moment. What process is she going through while doing this? Especially for readers who may not be as familiar with alchemy and, you know, working with just in general chemicals. Like how does one thing effect the other and why’s this so important? Why is she nervous, you know? Why is she scared? So to have a vested interest in whether or not she will succeed, you have to kind of understand the scene and get those details and get those emotions. So by decompressing it and giving it that detail and that flavor it works a lot better in that respect. So that’s what I ended up with.
Luis:Yeah, yeah. And now the scene really works and it has a lot of tension in it and it’s a very exciting moment. So stuff like that. So just generally look for moments that you may have summed up a little bit too much. Like I said, it’s better to err in the side of decompression than to compress too much. That said, you can over decompress and end up with – I don’t even know if you guys are familiar with Robert Jordan’s Wheel of Time series but I personally think that that is just way too decompressed. There are moments in that book, in that series that could really use a little bit of compression in just summing up characters, getting up and doing whatever it is that they’re supposed to be doing. It just drives me crazy.
Alesha: What are you talking about? I like 20-page descriptions of what someone is wearing.
Luis: It doesn’t further the plot and then you’re like, “What was that for? Why?” I mean, you care about the characters but really it’s like nothing happens for like half a book just because all you’re doing is describing somebody getting up and getting dressed, and that really doesn’t do anything for…
Alesha: But luckily you just love the characters so much that you’re…
Luis:Well, again, and part of the benefits of decompression is the character building aspect of decompression and empathizing with the characters. So yes, I guess that’s…
Alesha: Where did I leave off in that series, by the way?
Luis: I don’t remember. I think you were like in book ten or 11. I don’t remember.
Alesha: Yeah, I think so. The only person I care about now is Egwene.
Alesha: Yes. Amazon and Smashwords and at the iBookstore.
Luis:All right. It’s free on the iBookstore?
Alesha: Yes.
Luis:Oh. I didn’t know. Hey, I didn’t know.
Alesha: We go to the iBookstore.
Luis:There’s an iBookstore? i…Books? And if you want to pick up another free book you can subscribe to my newsletter and you could pick up my Art of Book. And you should get a free digital download as soon as you sign up. So until next time, there’s an iBookstore. We’ll see you in the next video when we’ll be talking about something else. All right. Bye.
BOOKS – The Memory Book
I’ve been reading a lot. I’ve been education myself quite a bit lately on just about anything that strikes me as useful. I’ve become obsessed with something new lately, namely, my mind, my brain, my memory. I want to learn faster, and retain more. To this end I picked up the book The Memory Book: The Classic Guide to Improving Your Memory at Work, at School, and at Play.
This book rocks.
I wrote a post a few months back about learning to teach yourself. Well, one of the skills you need to master when teaching yourself is “encoding.” Being able to retain the information you obtain, at will. I knew about a few mnemonic devices but this book really breaks them down into ONE, namely “association.”
The info in here works great. I can retain any information I choose to retain at will now. It’s amazing. It just takes a little imagination.
That said, I will add a disclaimer. mnemonic devices do NOT improve your “natural memory”. By which I mean, the memory you were born with. What they do is give you tools that will improve your “active memory.” By which I mean, the memory you use when you consciously want to remember something.
Still, it’s a fantastic book and I highly recommend it.
For more comics and stories written by me: COMICS AND STORIESIf you like what you read, please consider signing up to my rss feed.
WRITING – Four Things to Think About When Writing a Novel Part 1 of 4
Simpsons Quote:
Lisa: ”Miss Tan, I lovedThe Joy Luck Club. It really showed me how the mother-daughter bond can triumph over adversity.”
Amy Tan: “No, that’s not what I meant at all. You couldn’t have gotten it more wrong.”
Lisa: ”But…”
Amy Tan:”Please just sit down. I’m embarrassed for both of us.”
Hi, this is a four part series about “things to think about when writing a novel”. This part one. In this post I’m going to be talking about where to start a story.
You can watch the video below or read the transcript:
Some of the links below are affiliate links. Thanks for your support.
The Beginning
I’ve been my wife’s editor in her series, The Gray Tower series. Her first book is called The Tower’s Alchemist. The second one is called Dark Rift. The third one is called Circadian Circle, and I’m currently editing it. So I have that editor on the brain kind of a thing. There are a lot of things that I tend to look at when I’m reading her manuscripts.
I’m trying to make sure that the story’s going to be as good as possible, of course. But there are certain things that I’m really honing in on. Some things she’s gotten really, really good at that I don’t have to call attention to t anymore.. But there are some things that she still continues to do that I think could improve.
So, today I’m going to be talking about one of the bigger things that I think is really important when writing a novel. And that is the beginning of the novel. That’s where you get hooked, right? In any kind of story at all, you kind of want to make sure that you hook the audience immediately when you first start reading- at least the first chapter maybe.
In Medias Res
Just try to really like especially show what the reader’s going to be in for in the first chapter, what it’s going to be like, what’s going to happen. One of the best ways to do this is to start your story in medias res. In medias res is Latin for starting in the middle of the action. I keep telling this to my wife. Sometimes she likes to just start her story just in a conversation or something.
Well, it’s not the best hook. Often times, there’s really nothing happening. It’s all setup. I always get on her case about it. Usually what I tell her is start there, but keep writing until you get to somewhere interesting, then start there where it starts getting interesting and get rid of the first part. If it’s all setup and there’s a lot of things that need to be done, you can somehow put it back in.
The Movie LIMITLESS
There’s a movie called Limitless, starring Bradley Cooper. And it’s great, because what happens is at the beginning of the story, you see Bradley Cooper’s character on top of a building. He’s at the edge, he’s about to jump.
There’s obviously somebody at the door trying to get in, and he’s going to jump off the building and kill himself because it’s better to do that than to confront whatever’s trying to bash down his door. That is like, in the middle of the story. You immediately get hooked. You ask yourself,
“What the heck? And say, how did he get there!?” Then you flashback to the rest of the movie. It eventually loops around, and you start off back there where he was on a building.
But the whole point is to start where it’s good, and then work your way back. It’s really very important.
How it’s Done in The Tower’s Alchemist
With my wife’s book, originally— and I don’t think it’s a big secret, because she used to have both first chapters of her first two books, both of them online. In Tower’s Alchemist, when you read the book, the original first chapter was what is now, chapter two. If you look at chapter two, it’s good, it’s a conversation between two characters in the intelligence agency office right before her lead character got an assignment.
That’s great, and it sets up the world, and the conversation of these two characters, but it’s really dull because, you’re starting the story on a conversation in an office. And even though that’s the chapter where you get the catalyst to the rest of the story, what the story’s going to be about and the character’s sent off on a mission in that chapter, you don’t get a flavor or taste of what you’re in for.
If you read the actual chapter that’s in the book now, chapter number one, it starts off in the middle of gun fight. And basically, the entire first chapter basically goes, this is what you’re in for- this kind of action, this is the world that we’re going to be in, this is who you’re fighting, you’re fighting Nazi’s and then there’s like a monster in there, and then there’s Cruenty in the woods, and there’s magic being thrown everywhere. And it’s like, what!? You know?
You understand, from that first chapter, that’s what you’re getting in the book. Then, you can slow down and then rebuild back up to that. And that’s exactly what Alesha did. She wrote a really great first chapter, and then she was able to slowly build into the next chapter by moving chapter one into chapter two and creating a brand new chapter one which establishes the world. And it’s not just the throwaway prologue type of thing either, because what it does is it sets up the character’s motivation for the rest of the book.
That first chapter sets up the character’s personal motivation. You can actually see why the character is thinking the way she’s thinking in chapter two by that point. It’s great.
Pay Attention to the Beginning
So, that’s my first recommendation, to start in medias res. And like I told her, it’s okay, don’t kill yourself, just start writing wherever. Just start writing wherever. The moment it starts really getting good, that’s when you cut off everything before and that’s where you ought to start. Okay?
Those are just my tips. It’s one of the many things that I look for when I read my wife’s manuscripts and her story, and make sure there’s something that hooks the audience from the very beginning.
Alright? So, I’ll talk to you about the next thing, next time. And if you want to get a free book, Art of Luis Escobar, which is me, you can subscribe to my newsletter. Just put in your email and you’ll get a free digital copy of my ‘Art of’ book. Okay? So, I’ll talk to you next time. Bye.
MOVIES – Can’t Wait to See Man of Steel movie
(Some of the links below are affiliate links. Thanks for your support)
If you’ve read my blog for a while, you know that I’m a huge superhero nerd. I love superheroes. But my favorite all time superhero is Superman.
He is definitely NOT the most popular. Arguably, I’d say Batman is. There is a LOT of people who think Superman is just lame.
They often say, “I can’t relate to Superman, he’s too overpowered.”
At some point, I’m going to have to write a post as to why Superman is awesome. BUT maybe I won’t have to. Maybe the Man of Steel movie coming out (as of the time of this writing) tomorrow will do the job for me.
I’m hoping that the movie will do to Superman what the first Ironman movie did for Ironman.
I really hope I don’t end up having to write a post on what Man of Steel got wrong.
All that said, I couldn’t get my mind off Superman for the last two weeks. But what to do? Well, I decided to re-watch as many episodes of the last three seasons of Smallville as I could.
The show is really the only way that you can really binge on a good modern live action take of the Superman myth. All the other live action Superman’s are either really dated or don’t get it.
Especially the last three seasons. They were exceptionally good. Those season introduced more DC characters combined than they the entire run put together. I mean, they even introduced the Legion of Superheroes for the first time in a live action setting. That is awesome! And it was written by Geoff Johns too.
So if you’ve seen Man of Steel and want more Superman or you’re like me and just want to watch live action Superman stuff before going to watch the live action movie, go watch some Smallville.
Well, it seems that the “special project” I worked on a few weeks back has gotten the green light, so it’s moving forward. I’m currently doing Character Layout work on it. I’m not sure how this is going to effect my revision work next week. I haven’t done Layout in a while and it’s a LOT of work in a very different way than doing boards. I hope I can get my work done by the end of the week, just in case.
In the meantime, at least it seems this thing I’m working on will get seen at some point.
Go to the article to download the pdf of the tips as well as a more organized written version of the info in the video. Also, leave a comment for them if you found his information useful.
MOVIES
My wife Alesha and I got to do something we don’t often get to do now a days, namely, go to the movies. Alesha REALLY wanted to go see THE HUNGER GAMES, which we both enjoyed quite a bit. I wasn’t as gung ho as she was but I went along because she was really excited about it. Neither one of us had read the books but we both thought the premise was interesting. This isn’t to say that the premise was original, especially since there was a Japanese movies, years ago, called BATTLE ROYALE, with a similar premise. But THE HUNGER GAMES was a lot less twisted.
In my mind, what really set THE HUNGER GAMES apart from BATTLE ROYALE was that it wasn’t ABOUT the actual games. It almost felt as if the games themselves where secondary to the set up. This isn’t to say that the games weren’t interesting. It’s just that without taking all the time the movie did in setting up the characters and the universe before showing the games, I don’t think it would have been as good of a movie. In fact, it’s the lack of set up that makes BATTLE ROYALE much less interesting. Also, BATTLE ROYALE was much more gruesome, while HUNGER GAMES, which also dealt with a similar subject matter, didn’t relish in any gore.
I found myself thinking of stories like 1984 and BRAVE NEW WORLD while watching THE HUNGER GAMES. When watching BATTLE ROYALE, I wondered why I was watching it at all. Because of this, I concluded THE HUNGER GAMES was BATTLE ROYALE done right.
I will note one observation that came to me as I watched HUNGER GAMES. Much has been said about the commentary this story makes on society when it comes to materialism, media, and the devaluing of human life. I mean, part of the story is about how a desensitized culture gets together to watch young people kill each other for entertainment. This works very well in book form, since it’s written words on a page, without the reader partaking in the entertainment in the same way the people in the story are. The thing is, I couldn’t help but notice the irony of sitting in a movie theater and paying to see exactly the same entertainment that the these “bad people” where tuning in to watch. As movie goers, we participate in and condone the entertainment put forth by the story as wrong and bad, when we’re entertained by the games ourselves. Because of this, I think the movie adds a extra element of reflection, that the story in book format didn’t.
What do you think? Am I off on this point?
ART
Don’t know what to say here except that I’m slowly narrowing the gap and getting closer to finishing page 7 on my script. I think next week I’ll be “off script”. What I’ll have to board will be something new that I have no script or treatment to work off of. It will be completely off the cuff.
I’m actually excited about it. For now though, here are my latest thumbnails.
For more comic and stories written by me, CLICK HERE.
If you like what you read, please consider signing up to my rss feed.
Week two of three revising episode 21’s Act 1 board. I’m so glad I have another week left to finish this board up. The revisions are pretty heavy. I’ve got everything roughed out, it’s just a matter of cleaning everything up for the layout crew to follow.
Meanwhile, in other news, that special project I was working on last week and the week before has gotten approval by some people high up. It’s one step closer to actually being produced. There’s one more step left to get through so it could get green lit. It would be nice if it happens.
ART/WRITING
After a two week break, I finally got back to working on my film. Here’s what I did:
It was good to get back to it again, but I’m SO tired of working on it. I just want this part of the process to be DONE. I took a look at what I still had to thumbnail, and it was a TON. I had two really big fight scenes to do. Too much, far too much. I’ve been questioning myself from the start if all the fighting is really getting me anything. I’m still not sure but I’m sure as heck cutting some it as of right now.
I took a look at what I had written in my Treatment and simply cut two of the fight scenes right out of the film. They will be replaced by one much smaller fight which will, hopefully, have the same key information in it in much less time.
The info I need to convey will be that the demons that give the Sorcerers their power manifests visually when they tax their power, and that Rob’s hammer, knocks the demon out of Sorcerers. That’s what I need to say. As long as that info is there, the rest of the fight can be intense but short.
IF after I’m done with a rough cut of the film, I discover that it needs a longer fight, I’ll see about incorporating some of the original ideas. Otherwise, I will be happy with doing far less work.
Below is the part of my treatment that is now getting cut, in case you were wondering what it would have been like:
Rob is on his knee exhausted. The Female Sorcerer, though exhausted and bruised, sees this as an opportunity. She takes out her last blade. Sprinkles blood on it and throws it. Rob looks up just as she does it. He moves his hammer in the way to block it. The Sorceress splits her hands apart away from each other and the blade splits into two blades. They go around the hammer and stab Rob sinking into his shoulders. As if they were syringes, the blades suck Rob’s blood glowing red. The Sorceress feels the blades grow powerful with the blood and receives new strength from them. The demon that gives her power, manifest around her visibly.
Rob goes to take out the blades but they pull themselves out. The blades attack again and split into four blades when they do. Rob manages to block some but some get through and stab him taking blood. Those that do, multiply as well. Rob runs toward the Sorceress while hitting blades away. He knows, once she’s knocked out, the blades will stop. As he approaches, she throws Blinding Dust from a small cylinder. The dust hits home and blinds Rob. The blades (which are many now) fly up in the air with a gesture from the sorceress and then, with another gestured, rain down on Rob.
Rob reacts as best he could and spins his hammer as fast as he can. The blades bounce of like an umbrella.
As He does this, the Sorceress uses his temporary distraction to try and stab him in the back.
The Raven sees this and squawks out a warning. Rob quickly turns and strikes at the Sorceress. The hammer hits her square on the chest. The manifestation of the demon inside her gets knocked out of her as if IT, not the Sorceress was hit by the blow. It leaves the Sorceress’ body as the Sorceress cries in pain and passes out. The demon seems to evaporate in a silent scream.
A cry from the Other Male Sorcerer, makes Rob turn.The Other Male Sorcerer had just managed to recover, only to see the Sorceress go down.As far as he’s concerned, Rob has gone too far. He knows what Rob has just done to the woman he loves and he will pay and suffer for it. Exhausted as he is, he takes out a vile, opens it, puts some blood in it with an incantation and throws it on the ground. He then pours power out and a mist begins to raise around Rob and himself. The demon that gives him his power physically manifest around him. His fingers grow into talons.
Rob readies himself. He can’t see where his enemy is going to attack from. Suddenly claws flash out of the mist. Rob dodges and blocks the attack. The claws hit a bush behind Rob. It instantly dries up and rots away. The attacks stop. Rob realizes that if the claws hit him, he’s going to die.Seconds later, the attack begins anew, only this time, it seems like the claws are coming from more directions. It’s all Rob can do to stop the attack. Just as suddenly as it began, the attack stops. Rob doesn’t feel so good.The Sorcerer’s voice comes from the mist and needles Rob if he’s feeling okay. Then he informs Rob the mist is rotting his senses and his mind.Looking into the mist, Rob sees the enormous silhouette of the Sorcerer. As if the mist is giving him power. It slips into the mist and he gets attacked by a barrage of claws. It’s all Rob can do not to get touched by them. He manages to just barely survive the attack when it suddenly stops. He can barely stand. He staggers back, hoping to hit a wall. He does. At least with a wall behind him, he knows there won’t be any attacks from behind.The Sorcerer laughs at him and tells him mocking that it won’t help him. He imparts to Rob that not even his Raven can help him out of this.
Rob’s vision is blurring and he’s having trouble thinking. Still, he begins to spin the hammer before him, faster and faster until the mist begins to rustle and move away.
Realizing what’s going on, the Sorcerer decides he needs to finish things off. The Claws come out in all directions at Rob. Rob won’t last without help. He hopes he managed to clear enough mist for his Raven to be able to see him. The Raven flying overhead had been scanning desperately for Rob. He sees the gap he caused and sees the Sorcerer attacking. He swoops down into the mist and attacks The Sorcerer.
Distracted by the bird, the claws stop for a moment. Rob recovers just long enough to hear his bird squawking. He runs in the direction of the sound. The sorcerer realizes he’s coming and attacks but it’s too late. Rob swing the hammer and hits the Sorcerer in the face. The manifestation of the demon that gave the Sorcerer his power reacts as if IT was hit in the face. The demon flies out of the Sorcerer. The Sorcerer screams in pain. The demon evaporates in a silent scream as the Sorcerer falls to the ground. The mist dissipates and goes away. His body suddenly seems to deflate like a balloon and becomes scrawny and weak. The hair covering his face had been knocked out of the way revealing a shriveled ugly face. The other Male Sorcerer sits up, looks at himself, looks at his hands and cries out that he has lost his powers and then begins to sob.
Do you see what I mean about this being a lot of fighting?
VIDEOS/WRITING
Speaking of story and writing, here’s a TED Talks with Pixar writer/director Andrew Staton who also directed the new movie JOHN CARTER, talking about writing by telling us the story of his career in reverse:
For more comic and stories written by me, CLICK HERE.
If you like what you read, please consider signing up to my rss feed.
I managed to finish my job early last week. I ended up getting put on a Simpsons video game project for the day. Looks fun. That’s all I’ll say about that.
This week I started revisions on another episode. Fun show. My Act has some heavy rewrites but the theme is so fun, I don’t mind.
I was also given the Couch Gag to board. It’s short and sweet. A thankful change from the epic Couch Gags I had been assigned before.
ART/WRITING
After a year of developing the story, I FINALLY finished writing my script. It feels sooo good. By “script”, I mean, I wrote down all the dialogue…and nothing else. No description, just dialogue. It looks like this:
LS: You’re coming with us now barbarian.
R: Coming with you? Coming WITH you, really? You’re…you’re, not going to try to kill me or anything? …Where do you think you’re taking me?
LS: Stop playing games and come with us.
R: (HOLDING BACK ANGER) Look, I can probably guess why you guys are here but I haven’t got the slightest idea why you want to take me anywhere. Plus, you guys acting all hostile sure as hell doesn’t make me want to go anywhere with you, so…please, can you just leave me alone?
LS: How dare you!
R: What?! You’re bothering ME. I haven’t done anything to you!
LS: Haven’t done anything to us? You’ve hurt my friends! Do you deny that you’ve incapacitated 30 different Sorcerers that have come in contact with you in the past? People I know personally. The ruthlessness of the those attacks where completely uncalled for. Your dangerous! You should be locked up. Your a menace to society. If anyone knew how evil you were, no one let you walk around free.
R: WHAT?! Are you kidding me?! Those FRIENDS of yours ATTACKED me. I was defending myself. I asked them to stop and they kept on coming. I didn’t seek them out, they sought me out. I didn’t want ANYTHING to do with them in the first place!
LS: Oh really?
R: Yes, really!
LS: Then if what you say is true, you won’t mind coming with us so that we can sort this all out. We take you to the Sorcerer’s High Tower and you plead your case. If what you say can be proven, then you can go on your way and no one will bother you again.
R: (Laughs)
LS: Are you mocking us!
R: No, no…It’s just, this is just seems a bit crazy to me. Okay so, you’ve wanted me to go with you to the Sorcerer’s High Tower from the start right?
LS: Yes.
R: Okay, I see. And you guys are going to put me on trail for defending myself?
LS: IF you where defending yourself, you will be found innocent.
R: And who’s going to judge me? Sorcerers?
LS: Yes.
R: And somehow that’s going to be fair?
LS: Of course.
R: Are you kidding me? You guys think I’m so sort of Dark Lord that’s going to take over the world. You ALL hate me. There’s NO WAY I’m getting a fair hearing.
LS: It will be fair.
R: I’m sorry but there’s nothing from experiences with you Sorcerers that I can point to that makes me believe you. What if I don’t want to go? What if I decide to stay here?
LS: Then your actions will speak louder than your words. It would prove your guilt because you’re obviously hiding something. We will KNOW that you are what the prophecy foretells you to be. Which means that we will be forced to kill you in order to save the word from your slavery.
R: (SIGH) You got to be kidding me. You realize this is catch 22? I’m damned if I do, I’m damned if I don’t. This is EXACTLY how all the other fights with the other guys started. For goodness sake, I’m NOT some evil overlord that going to take over the world. I’m just a guy who want to be left alone so I can eat my lunch in peace. So…I’m sorry, but I’m going to stay here. Okay? Please leave.
LS: I’m sorry to hear you say that. I truly am. I tried to reason with you but…you leave me no choice. (TURNING TO HIS COMPANIONS) Alright guys, lets do this…
R: WAIT! Wait. Just a sec. Just give me a second. Okay, listen, what can I do that will get you guys to give me five minutes to eat my lunch? Anything? I just want five minutes here. Then you could try to kill me all you want.
That’s pretty much what it looks like. The dialogue isn’t set in stone and if it doesn’t come across well, I’ll change it till it does.
Why no descriptions? Because I want to be able to improvise the visuals as I go. Besides, all the description was written down at the treatment phase and I didn’t want to repeat myself. It’s not like anyone is suppose to read the script but me. This is the usual way I write scripts for myself.
I also started designing the last characters for my film. The demons. Starting with the snake demon:
I’m not very good at designing monsters and none of these sketches were what I wanted. None, but the last one I drew on the bottom right corner. That on is definitely beginning to go in the right direction. I wanted something that looked scary, not heroic. I ended up looking at a picture of Christopher Walken and started to draw a caricature of it. Half way through, I began adding reptilian, features to it and it started to look a bit freaky. I’m gonna have to play around with the idea some more. Hopefully I’ll get something I like.
BOOKS/FAMILY
Like I did last week, I’m posting another chapter from my wife’s book THE TOWER’S ALCHEMIST. This week, it’s Chapter 3.
But first…I was wondering if you could do us a favor. Whether or not you’re planning to buy the book or not, I would REALLY help us out, if you can go to the Amazon page of the book and check the little boxes next to the tags near the bottom. They look like this:
You’ll have to be logged in to see the boxes.
The reason we’re asking, is that by doing so, whenever someone looks up something related to those tags, there’s a higher chance that Alesha’s book will pop up near the top of the list. This would help our visibility a lot.
To go to the Amazon page click on one of the links below:
The $2.99 Kindle copy of the book:
or…
The hard copy of the book:
Thank you in advance.
Okay, so without further ado:
CHAPTER THREE
The cab driver flinched when he saw the bomb drop. It fell through the sky with a deadly grace, but I didn’t bat an eyelash. I pressed my hand against the window and reached out with my senses, making sure that a curse hadn’t been laid along with the bomb’s contents.
“Are you sure it’s safe to go to the air hangar?” he asked, slowing the car.
“It was a leaflet bomber,” I told him, as we watched a multitude of folded papers eject from the bomb and swirl through the air. The empty container would land without incident, but the propaganda leaflets would make their way into people’s hands—but hopefully not their hearts.
He wiped his brow. “Thank God. I thought it would explode.”
I shook my head at some of the Royal Air Force officers running over and collecting the leaflets. Though the Nazis dropped their leaflet bombs in city centers where they could reach the civilian population, every now and then a batch would be directed toward a military or industrial site. I didn’t know how many Air Force officers gave credence to the propaganda printed on those papers, but it probably wouldn’t galvanize them to read about how the impeccable prophet Nostradamus predicted their demise four hundred years ago and to see pictures of dead Ally soldiers littering the ground. That is, if you believed in their Black Propaganda.
“You can let me out here, thank you.” I gave him a squeeze on the shoulder and then opened my door.
“SOE isn’t paying me enough for this. One day it’ll fall out of the sky and hit me right on the head.” He let out a nervous laugh.
I smiled back at him and said goodbye. As I exited the car, I saw the sky turn a deep orange and I knew that at sunset I’d have to board the transport plane to Paris. I could hear the engine of a spitfire fighter plane pass over and wondered if it went to hunt down the bomber that had dropped the leaflets. As a couple of officers admitted me into the hangar, I spotted one of the pilots running in from the field with a few leaflets in hand.
“Good evening, Emelie.”
“Hi, Max.” I took one of the leaflets he offered and grunted when I read it. “What are you guys going to do with these?”
“Burn them…like the others.”
That sounded like a good idea, especially since the one I held in my hand made me want to toss it into a fire without looking back. It had a drawing of a dark crooked tower with a caricature of a wizard perched on top and raining his spells down on frightened people. In bolded letters it said, “The Gray Tower helps now, so it can harm later.”
I gave the leaflet back to Max. “Make sure you get rid of all of these.”
We halted when Richard approached us with my supply pack and jumpsuit in hand. He gave them to me and pointed toward a changing room. “We’re leaving in an hour.”
“Lieutenant,” Max said, “We got these—”
Richard jerked his thumb in the direction of one of the large storage bins. “We don’t need any of that bollocks here. Trash them.”
Max immediately headed for the bin to dispose of the leaflets. I was glad Richard refused to even take a look at them because sometimes I’d get odd stares or snide comments from colleagues at SOE who knew I had trained with the Gray Tower.
At first I had dismissed it as plain ignorance, or even a bit of envy on days that I needed my own confidence boosted. However as the war progressed, I realized that many of them were afraid. In the back of their minds they probably wondered if I’d turn rogue and blast them all away.
Though the Masters imposed strict rules on members of the Order while at the Gray Tower, they didn’t have much to say when it came to us being in the outside world. I could understand why people, or governments for that matter, would be wary. Still, it didn’t hurt to show a little friendliness, especially toward those of us who willingly joined the Ally cause and risked our lives each day.
As Richard turned and started barking orders at the maintenance crew that worked on a bomber, I made my way through the bustle on the hangar floor to the changing room. I felt a little guilty about making this my last assignment, but I promised myself that I’d at least make it my most successful one. The average life expectancy of an SOE agent was just a few months, and I’ve lasted over a year. So, if one really wanted to get into the mathematics of it, I’ve basically served a couple of lifetimes.
That had to count for something, right?
When night fell, I rode in a transport plane that could be shot out of the sky any second, and poised myself to leap toward the dark terrain of the northern region of France. From there I’d have to find my way to Paris. Most SOE agents came here by plane or submarine, sneaking their way toward the Maquis resistance fighters or a Nazi target.
We started off doing “small jobs” like operating anti-Nazi radio programs, bringing in food and arms to friends and stranded Ally soldiers, and relaying messages and news back to SOE headquarters. Most of us were women, from all walks of life, from both Europe and America, who wanted to do more for our countries than to stay at home and worry.
The male-dominated intelligence community treated us with disdain, but soon even they couldn’t refute our important contributions. “The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare,” Winston Churchill once jokingly called us, although the epithet was perfectly apt. We did anything and everything to frustrate the Third Reich and set Europe ablaze, and we weren’t afraid to fight dirty.
“Looks like you’re the last one in for the week.” Richard frowned as he closed the cockpit entrance and made his way over and knelt next to me. I was already sitting in the area where the drop hole would open and I’d have to jump out with my parachute.
“You say it as if it’s a bad thing.” I glanced at my hands and clasped them together, unsure of what to say next. I knew that he had known Stella and even took a fancy to her. Though he never admitted this and would vehemently deny it if I ever brought it up, a girl could just tell about these sorts of things.
“How is it faring on your side?” His strong gaze demanded me to face him and answer. He wanted to know if there was any news about Stella, but there wasn’t any. I really didn’t want to talk about this with him, and I didn’t want to plant any nasty seeds of doubt. I wished his co-pilot had come back here to see me off.
I half smiled. “If I’m alive, then I’m faring well. I’ll let you know if I hear anything, you know…”
The signal light flashed and the metal panel beneath us slowly opened. A gust of wind encircled us and I gave a quick nod toward him. Though his facial expression revealed nothing, I felt like I needed to say something to him as a word of encouragement.
“Go, Emelie!” Richard cut me off before I could speak. He didn’t do it in a crass or dismissive manner, but perhaps in that moment he realized that he didn’t want to dwell on Stella any more than I did.
I took a deep breath and scooted myself forward. With a little effort I slipped through the drop hole and went drifting toward land. The first time I had leapt out of a Royal Air Force transport plane, I could barely keep my wits. I kept imagining the Gestapo or SS strolling along a lonely stretch of road to find me splattered all over. I may be an alchemist, but I have yet to figure out a potion or elixir to make me airborne.
My parachute had been released as soon as I jumped out of the plane, and I fell silently through the night air hoping the white umbrella above me didn’t serve as an invitation to enemy gunfire. I thought all was clear as I nearly touched the ground until I noticed a convertible-top jeep barrel down the road and then slow to a halt.
I knew the patrol officer driving the trekker spotted me, and I cursed under my breath as I skidded across the field. My adrenaline went surging through me as I grabbed my knife from my jumpsuit’s outer pocket and cut myself loose. I rolled away and scanned the area, trying to decide whether to lay low or just make a run for it. The only thing I could see was the trekker’s headlight beam; the black of night enveloped everything else, including me.
I grew up in the city, where we had streetlights and bright theater marquee signs. The one time I actually went on a trip to the forest where there weren’t convenient lights stationed to guide my path, I found out just how terrified I was of absolute darkness. I still didn’t like the dark, and I dared not move because I wanted to hear where the officer was. All I could hear though was my heavy breathing, and I was so anxious that the only thing I could do was press the back of my hand to my mouth to stifle the sound.
A shot rang out and I quickly dropped to my knees. I didn’t know what direction the bullet came from and I tried encouraging myself with the morbid thought that there have been plenty of people who survived gunshot wounds. I finally steadied my breathing and gripped my knife, waiting for him to make another move. However, I immediately bucked and dropped my weapon when a pair of arms enclosed me in a fierce grip.
I swung my head back and gave him a good head-butt, making him cry out in pain and release me. I quickly turned around and delivered a left hook and dodged his fist when he tried to reciprocate. Although we couldn’t really see each other, we could hear and feel each other’s body movements in this deadly dance. I heard him swing at me again and I blocked, but not before losing my balance and landing on my back. Fighting in a jumpsuit could be cumbersome sometimes.
“Who are you?” he asked in German, grabbing hold of me and dragging me by the scruff of my neck toward the beaming headlights. He shoved me against the front of the car and I slowly faced him with arms raised in surrender. I had to plan my next move very carefully.
“I’m from the Russian Liberation Group,” I answered in perfect Russian. “Praskovya sent me.” I thought I’d add that part since he cocked his revolver. The Russian Liberation Group had been sending in spies and other reinforcements for their Nazi allies for about a month now. Some of these operatives entered France the same way I had.
“She sent you?” He had switched over to speaking Russian. Though his tone sounded doubtful, he slightly lowered his gun.
“You know us…we do everything backward, comrade.” I prayed the codeword we intercepted last week still held.
The back of my neck began to burn and I thought of what I could say next. He saved me the trouble when he slid his gun into his holster and offered me his hand. “Leave it to the Russians to send women to do a man’s job. What does Praskovya want?”
I quickly grasped his hand, one of the easiest access points, and honed my magical senses, tracking the rhythm of his heart and the electrical currents in his brain. As his heartbeat slowed and his mind hazed, I spoke to him.
“What’s your name?”
“Karl Manfried.”
“How many other officers are in the Paris office?”
“Twenty six.”
That was a little more than I cared to handle alone. “Why don’t you go back to your headquarters and greet your comrades with a Molotov cocktail?”
He slowly nodded and let his hand slip from mine. He headed straight for his trekker and jumped inside. The jeep rumbled and slowly reversed, then made a turn in the direction of the city. By this time my hands shook from exhaustion and my head ached from the amount of concentration I had mustered to use body magic on him. It also didn’t help that I was hungry and irritated. In any case I needed to make it to my safe house even though it was apparently past curfew, and I needed as many officers off the streets as possible. Hopefully Karl would be the distraction I needed once I reached the city.
I pulled out my foldable bike from the pack attached to the parachute. After spending twenty minutes longer than I usually would setting it up, I unzipped and shed the jumpsuit to reveal a rather tight-fitting milkmaid’s uniform. I promised myself that I’d make it back to London just to shoot Ian for making me wear this.
I stuffed the jumpsuit into the pack and placed it in the little straw basket attached to the bike’s handlebars. I peddled down the road without looking back and took note of the Seine River that ran to my right. It looked like I was south of Mantes, just outside of Paris. I kept my eyes open for more trekkers, hoping that I could make it through without any trouble.
When I made it to the city proper, I took some backstreets to avoid a few SS officers on patrol and pulled my bike up to an alley and slowly walked through. I scowled when I saw an officer in the middle of the alley, against the wall with his woman, blissfully lost in a dirty and quick cuzzy. They either didn’t notice or didn’t care when I walked by and wrinkled my nose at the scent of garbage and piss.
I wondered if the woman was just another collaborator selling her body for food or gas, or an agent of the Resistance engaged in an act of seduction. Sometimes I wondered what went through women’s heads when they did this. I’ve used my red garnet lipstick twice to kiss men and enthrall them so they would do what I want, and those were the least arousing experiences I’ve ever had. If I were that woman, I’d probably be thinking about how much longer it would be before the deed was done, or why he didn’t get us a hotel room.
I grew more confident as I turned a corner and headed down another lonely street, but unfortunately fate would not have it be that easy for me. Before I was halfway down the street, two SS officers headed toward me from the opposite end and hailed me. Though I put on a stoic face, my fingers trembled and my heart raced. Our confrontation would be inevitable since they would be complete idiots not to question a milkmaid out riding her bike after curfew.
“Halt right there, mademoiselle.” The first officer, whose nametag read Adelbert, approached and grabbed hold of my bike.
The second, whose name was Gerhardt, grabbed my arm and spoke to me in French. “A little late to be delivering milk, isn’t it?”
“I…I was with my Pierre. I didn’t mean to take off so late.”
Adelbert leaned my bike against the brick wall of the closed shop we stood in front of. The menacing look in his dark eyes worried me more than the gun in his holster. “Well lucky for you that your sweetheart didn’t accompany you.”
Gerhardt forced me against the wall with my back to him. “Is it the same Pierre who lives by Le Petit bakery?” He had asked the question in English.
“I’m sorry,” I said back to him in French, “I don’t understand much English.”
He ran his hands along my body, pretending to frisk me. Hey…one more grope and you’ll get a kick to your face!
“Check her bag, Adelbert.”
My body tensed and I quickly assessed my options. I could stun Gerhardt with a blow and fight Adelbert, or even beat him to the bag so I could grab my weapons. However a bullet in the back of my head would end it all. If he opened the pack sitting in the basket, I would be the next one in front of a firing squad. Suddenly an explosion went off a few blocks down, and the sky lit up. I prayed the mind-hazed Karl Manfried had carried out my order.
“Scheisse! It’s the office!” Gerhardt, with a bewildered look on his face as if he couldn’t believe someone would dare attack his office, began running in the direction of the fire. Adelbert drew his revolver and followed.
I slid away from the wall and opened and shut my mouth. Thank goodness Gerhardt hadn’t broken my jaw. After rotating my aching shoulders I hopped on my bike and continued down the street, pedaling as hard as I could until I reached a winding road that led to the dark and quiet neighborhood near Vincennes where my safe house stood. I slowed and parked my bike at a small prayer chapel, taking my pack with me and quietly entering.
No one sat or prayed inside, but a beautiful statue of the Madonna oversaw a corner full of flickering candles. I went to the back room where the caretaker stored his cleaning supplies and extra candles, and I crawled beneath the small table where a trapdoor lay hidden beneath a rug. I lifted it and pulled on the iron handle as I carefully slipped inside. It was tricky getting the rug back over and then closing the door, but I managed to do it and began trekking through a dark underground passageway.
Though the path led me down a straight line, I wished I had at least swiped a candle. I felt like I was going to be swallowed by the darkness. I didn’t feel like going back so I just went at a steady pace and held my hands out in front of me just in case I stumbled. After walking through the underground passage for five minutes, I finally felt the false dirt wall that signaled the end of my journey.
I recalled Ian’s instructions for getting to the safe house and I felt for the hidden lever and pulled; the false wall cracked open. I pried it open further and then opened a reinforced wooden door behind it. I quickly slipped through, covering the door the way I found it. I crawled up a ladder and pushed open a trapdoor like the one in the chapel, except this one opened into a tool shed.
I supposed they really wanted to make me work to get here. I almost broke the trapdoor shutting it so hard out of irritation, and covered it with the rug that was in there. I listened for any noises—a voice, footsteps, or trekkers. When I was sure no one was nearby, I crept from the tool shed toward the back of the safe house which had an angel ornament hanging in the middle of the back door. I held my pack and slowly approached, giving a slightly urgent knock. I heard slow and hesitant footsteps and after a few seconds had elapsed, someone finally answered from the other side of the door.
“Who is it?” a woman’s muffled voice queried in French.
“Emelie.” I gave a grateful but tired grin when she opened the door.
“It’s late, Emelie.”
“Yes, but I have gifts.”
“From whom?”
All I wanted at this hour was a hot meal and a soft bed. “From 64 Baker Street.”
The woman nodded and smiled. “Then come in, Emelie, and make yourself at home.”
If you like what you read, please consider signing up to my rss feed.
Well, this week I managed to finish the first pass of my assignment. On Tuesday, we had a board meeting with the director and the head director. It was scheduled from two o’clock to five. We finished at seven. Personally, I don’t think it went well. There was a lot of things changed. It felt to me as if 80% of what I did was changed. In reality it was more like 60% or 70%. As I revised the boards after the meeting, I realized that a lot of the discussions of what to do felt like they where changing more than what was actually changed.
I’m no stranger to getting my boards revised but for some reason it was really difficult this time around not to feel disappointed my shots where getting changed. I guess because I wanted so badly to get everything “right” the first time. The truth is, there are just sooo many ways a sequence can be composed. Sometimes what I had worked, and sometimes it just needed reworking. I wish I’d gotten more things right. That way the meeting wouldn’t have taken so long.
I definitely think I was just getting too fancy with my shots, for my own good. Instead of drawing clear shots, I drew fancy shots. Next time, I’ll keep myself in check. I did learn a lot though. I’ll do better next time (if there is one).
When I first started doing board revisions I had the same fancy shot problem. My first revision meeting pretty much went the same way. Nothing I drew was used. As I started get more comfortable with the process and the directors became more used to me, the changes became less and less. But in storyboarding, there will always be changes. It’s part of the job.
There’s something special planned for my section that I can’t really talk about yet. Because of this, I have to finish it a week earlier than usual. This is actually making the work a bit more stressful than it should be for my first time boarding an Act. I’m doing the work at a faster pace than I would normally do it. This has actually caused me to start getting a bit burned out.
I’m going to need to take a tiny break soon. All that said, I can’t deny the fact that I’ve been having a great time in spite of it all.
ART
I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned it, but my wife Alesha has rewritten an e-book. She finished it and began sending it to agents, but in the end, no one wanted to give it chance. Publishers aren’t really looking for the type of story she’s written. So she decided to just publish it herself. The book is pretty much ready to go. All it needs is a cover which she has commissioned me to do. I promised her I’d do it and since the only thing she’s doing is waiting for me, I need to get it done.
Below is my preliminary rough of what the picture on the cover will look like. The final piece will be painted. It will be red and gray. The banner, her tie and perhaps her lips, will be red and the rest gray.
Perhaps in a future post, as the cover reaches completion, I’ll let you know what the book is about.
What do you think?
VIDEOS/WRITING
I saw this trailer for the upcoming CONAN THE BARBARIAN movie:
I thought it looked like fun and it rekindled my desire to finish my project. Especially since, my project is very much an homage to Conan and Robert E. Howard.
This weekend I managed to get in a few hours to edit my treatment again. Unfortunately, with what’s going on at work and trying to finish up my wife’s book cover, it’s getting more difficult to get things done. I’m going to try to keep working on it this weekend as well. It’s just getting more difficult because I’m so burned out that I’d much rather relax by reading something than to sit down and work on a rewrite.
For more comic and stories written by me, CLICK HERE.
If you like what you read, please consider signing up to my rss feed.
When we have a day off like Memorial Day, it’s nice, until we get to work and realize we have lost a day and the schedule hasn’t changed. I started on a episode two this week and Act 1 has a major rewrite. Pretty heavy duty stuff. I’ve been assigned some of it and my partner has the other stuff. I doubt we’ll be able to get through it this week. I hope I can finish most of it by Friday. I’ll need the extra time for the revisions in the other Acts I’ve been assigned.
VIDEOS
Here’s a video of Jeff Smith of BONE fame, explaining his comic making process:
A few more preliminary sketches for the ALICE IN WONDERLAND illustration I’m working on. This time, I drew a few quick sketches of Alice and the Mad Hater.
I’m satisfied with the look. It’s functional and it fits the style I had in mind.
I reworked the page comp so I could see a better representation of the positive and negative shapes. I think it looks good. Now I just have to do is draw it and finish it up. I hope to be done by Friday.
WRITING
Looks like I’m going to have to go over my treatment one more time for another rewrite. Why? Because I’ve been reading yet another book on writing. This one is THE TV WRITER’S WORKBOOK by Ellen Sandler. It was recommended by a friend of mine who is now a screen writer.
I must say, I love the book. Very practical advice. It even tells you the red flags you want to avoid when writing your treatment. My treatment is FULL of them, so now I have to go back and fix them. There is plenty of other advice from structure to dialogue to many other things based upon personal experience writing TV shows. It’s a very different book from the other ones I’ve read because it’s focuses on writing for TV, which is actually very different than writing for movies. At least, it seems that way to me.
I’m really hoping that all the work I’m putting into getting the foundations of my story in place, will eventually pay off in the long run.
For more comic and stories written by me, CLICK HERE.
If you like what you read, please consider signing up to my rss feed.
I’m having a pretty intense week. Act 2 has a BIG rewrite. My director wanted it all done by Wednesday. I gave it my best shot. There is a LOT of new scenes. I thought I was going to have all week to work on the Act. I wasn’t so lucky. Seems like my board revision partner got borrowed by David Silverman to work on something with him. I didn’t realize I would have to pick up the slack. I really like this show and I wanted to take my time to do it justice.
VIDEOS
For those of us that are really interested in the art of writing comedy, this is a great set of videos:
Last Friday, I finished revising the second draft of my story’s treatment. It works and reads better. I decided to proofread it on Monday, only to discover that some of the things I changed didn’t get saved in parts. That was irritating. It took me an hour and a half to proof read. I didn’t think it would take so long.
Another thing I discovered while reading it was that I REALLY got specific at that end of the treatment with the action but I was much more vague about it at the beginning. I’m not sure what I ought to do about that. Should I start adding more specific action at the beginning as well or should I leave it the way it is and work out the action during the drawing process? It would save me a lot of time in the end if I figure it out now. Although I might change my mind when I actually start drawing and then it would kinda be a waste of time.
ART
I have an illustration to finish, as soon as possible. It’s a ALICE IN WONDERLAND drawing.
I’ve been asked to illustrate the following paragraph from the book without using any text what so ever:
‘Tell us a story!’ said the March Hare.
‘Yes, please do!’ pleaded Alice.
‘And be quick about it,’ added the Hatter, ‘or you’ll be asleep again before
it’s done.’
Below is my first pass for the page. I still have to work out the comps a bit but it a good starting point:
I’ve also started some quick, exploratory sketches of the characters. This is what I have so far. The March Hare:
The Dormouse:
Below, is me, trying a rough of what might be the top part of the page:
I want to get done with this by the end of the week so I can get back to my cartoon. The ALICE illustration is due in three weeks but I’d rather get it over with now.
For more comic and stories written by me, CLICK HERE.
If you like what you read, please consider signing up to my rss feed.
First week back on the show after having three weeks off. Hit the ground running from the get go. I had to be done with the first part of my assignment by Wednesday. It took me longer than I wanted it to.
It didn’t help that I came in on Monday a bit brain dead.
I managed to get done, and was handed Act 2. Big rewrite but the episode is REALLY good. I’m happy to be working on it.
Okay, so below are two page five. The first one is the version I drew first:
I didn’t end up using it because I realized that it didn’t read the way I wanted it to. I wanted the eye of the reader to read the punchline first and THEN see the bunnies. But the way it actually read, you saw the bunnies first and then you read the punchline. I didn’t like that so I chose to move the panel up.
I was much happier with the final version.
Below is the under drawing:
Oh, and in case you where wondering why I hand draw the word balloons in my comics…I do it because it’s a comic. The word balloons ARE part of the art and part of the composition of every panel. Seems wrong not to do it.
VIDEOS
My dad is a fan of Juan Esquivel. I find his music fun and I own one of his cds. My dad showed me the video below on Friday because he said he found someone online that likes Juan Esquivel WAY MORE than him. Who IS Juan Esquivel? I’m glad you asked because the video below answers that very question. WHY am I putting this video up on my blog though? Because I thought this was a fantastic example of how one guy’s charisma can make simply talking into the camera and telling someone about what he’s passionate about, darn entertaining.
WRITING
I would be lying if I said I’ve spent every moment I had a little time, on finish up the second draft of my treatment. I got a little sidetracked wanting to start on my next project and I ended up spending the weekend trying to solve the “A” Plot. I got it to the point good spot. I told myself I would dedicate the rest of my week on my Illustrated Film. So I have. I’m happy to say the revision is coming along nicely. Hopefully I’ll have it done by the end of the week. I’m adding adjusting and generally enjoying this part of the editing process.
Since I’ve made some big changes, I’m going to have to go back to my old designs and made the necessary adjustments. I’ll probably have to do that next week.
For more comic and stories written by me, CLICK HERE.
If you like what you read, please consider signing up to my rss feed.
No word on what’s going on with the show. This is my second week off the show. One week left to go. Seems like time is passing by fast.
MY WEB COMIC
Below is the rough of the page above:
This next page is the under drawing for the page that I inked. I increased the levels of the line work because it was drawn very lightly:
I forgot to put the under drawing of page 2 last week so I’m doing it here. I was half way through the inking process when I scanned this, so it’s not JUST the under drawing:
VIDEOS
I had heard a lot about this documentary but I had never seen it. I was made aware of it through the Man Vs. Art Facebook page. Raul Aguirre Jr. posted the link there. Now I’m posting it here as well. I recommend you take a look. It’s a documentary called IN SEARCH OF STEVE DITKO. It’s the fascinating story of mysterious comic artist Steve Ditko, co-creator of Spider-man. It’s very cool:
It’s about how Alex Toth, one of my favorite artists, learned. It’s something I myself have discovered from experience but I think it’s very good information to know if you don’t know about it.
Here’s the quote that ends the article. It’s great:
“It was great fun, to learn anew. You think you know enough, but you don’t. You must open up; let it in. …be receptive, admit what you don’t know, which few are willing to do. Start from square one. Again!” ~Alex Toth
WRITING
I was finally able to work out the new versions of Scene 6 and Scene 8. It was by far, one the more difficult things I had to do to date. The reason was because I had to really pin down how the magick would work in my “universe”. I knew it was blood magick, and I new it has to do with binding one’s self with a demon. I also came up with a way to make the blood rituals “practical”, but I STILL didn’t know what magick was actually going to be used against Rob.
In order to figure this out, I thought I should give each Sorcerer a “theme” or “skill” of magick they were best at. I just didn’t know what they were going to be. In order to get ideas flowing in my head, I decided to go to my bookshelf and take three Role Playing game books down. These were CONAN: THE ROLEPLAYING GAME, MUTANTS AND MASTERMINDS RPG, and MAGE: THE ASCENSION.
The Conan book helped quite a bit. It’s basically a book of the Conan universe. The chapter on Sorcery in the Conan universe was very helpful since I’m basically taking that type of magick and having it play out a in a modern setting. What I got most from it was the idea that not all a Sorcerer’s magick is done on the spot, some of it is “prepackaged” and ready to use ahead of time, in the form on alchemical items that they carry around. That would help. Only I thought that in MY universe, these items had to be “activated” with a chant and some of the Sorcerer’s blood sprinkled on it. The book also gave me good examples of spells and themed magick that I might be able to use. For example, the “serpent” themed mind control magick in the book was perfect for my Lead Sorcerer. The section on magick poisons, also got me thinking as did the section on necromancy. Unfortunately it didn’t help much more beyond that. At least it gave me a flavor of what I was looking for.
The MUTANTS AND MASTERMINDS book is a book like a catalog or buffet of superpowers which you can mix, match, and modify to your heart’s content in order to come up unique powers for a superhero character. I was looking through it so that I could better theme my Sorcerers’ powers. I was hoping to come across a power that would get me thinking. Unfortunately, I didn’t find what I was looking for. Somehow the powers where a tad too overpowered and if they weren’t, they were too subtle or generic for me to want to use any.
By this point, after thinking about it for a day or so, I knew I wanted the Other Male Sorcerer to have have Necrotic like powers. But I didn’t want him raising skeletons or anything like that. I wanted him to be more of a destroyer of life. When I opened my MAGE: THE ASCENSION book, I looked specifically into the section on Mages who could control Entropy. Though the description and the powers weren’t exactly what I had in mind, they did give me a jumping off point for my character’s magick.
As I looked at all these books, I would write down things I thought I wanted and began making a small list of key words. This is what I wrote down:
Summoning
Kothic Demon fire
Necromancy
Entropy (Focus?)
Beast Claws
Poisons
Hypnosis (Serpent)
Domination (Serpent)
Alchemy
Acid?
Knives
Wall of Blades
Dancing Blades
Flying Blades
The terms in bold I had circled, meaning I was definitely going to use them, while the other things I was trying to fit together and make something I liked with them.
I the end, this is what I concluded:
The Lead Sorcerer would have domination powers and would use mind control and hypnosis as his main form of Magick. He could also summon the giant serpent creature, but only if he sacrificed a live serpent and mingled his blood with it and chanted the correct incantation.
The Other Male Sorcerer would have power of entropy. He would throw “Entropy Orbs” which he activates with his blood and an incantation. These Orbs cause whatever they crash into to prematurely age thousands of years in an instant. He also has claws in his hands which can rot whatever they touch. He uses them in conjunction with an alchemical mist, which he hides in to reach his target. He can summon a Winged Ape by infusing some of his own blood into the ripped out heart of a gorilla and saying the correct incantation. The resulting Winged Ape would look a little zombie like.
The Female Sorcerer’s magick consists of her control over blades she throws. Due to the nature of these blade, they tend to disintegrate once used. Her main form of attack would be poison tipped blades which she controls by sprinkling them with her own blood and throwing them with an incantation. She can also control larger blade with she can send spinning or dancing, anyway she wishes, as long as he concentrates. They must first be sprinkled with her blood. She also has a blinding powder she uses, when she needs to buy time for her magick to get going. Just like The Other Male Sorcerer, she can also summon a Winged Ape by infusing some of her own blood into the ripped out heart of a gorilla and saying the correct incantation.The resulting Winged Ape is silver and has sharp metal claws.
Once I had these details worked out, it was much easier to come up with the modification to Scene 6 and Scene 8. Scene 6 I finished first. I changed the focus of the fight so that it was more about destroying the hot dog than killing Rob. I’m not sure how well that will flow but I guess I’ll find out once I have the first visual pass of it done.
Scene 8 was much tougher. The hard part was coming up with the “super attack” the Sorcerers hit Rob with, by combining their powers together. I settled with some spinning blades keeping Rob in place while the Lead Sorcerer combines his mind power with the Other Male Sorcerer to try to disintegrate Rob. The rest is similar to what I had originally written, only with the new powers.
I’m a lot happier with this version.
For more comic and stories written by me, CLICK HERE.
If you like what you read, please consider signing up to my rss feed.
Comments Off on Black Terror Kid #2 page 3 plus roughs and underdrawings. How Alex Toth learned. Steve Ditko documentary. Solving my last story problems.